Awake and too full for sleeping on the night of the day we begin the Descent. I think of you, my Starhawk, my lover and creation who accepts so easily the status of flow and the gifts~ that we are magic, separated only by the thin veil of form. I’ve given you what I have~ I’m excited to know how much more you’ll get from me. I dream about the warmth in your escape, and worry you will leave. Will you wait for me? You’re a heavenly gift. Christ, my angel. I hope to see you again. I’ve dreamt of you for a long time. Can you handle my love? Only time will tell. Only fear keeps me fromJumping. But with you, at least the fall will be scenic and I have a chance at something I considered impossible before. I’ve thought about you as a father. I’ve thought about waking up with you, and our wedding. Above all, as I lie in bed awake on the night of the descent, I get back to what you represent~ the miraculous in seemingly mundane. I worry about leaving. Decisions make our future. This is my soul path. But I think maybe you hold the key to my life. Please stay.