To You

I only write this here

and call it proetry,

because to tell you how I feel,

I’m afraid,

would be too much for you.

You told me once,

“You can feel safe with me”.

But you didn’t mean it,

I later found out.

I am not angry with you,

it was the spirits

and the moment,

despite how much I wish it were true.

I’ve written to you a hundred times and erased it,

deleted it.

Technology is weird.

I secretly hope you’ll read this,

though I’m not sure how you’d find it,

only so that you know…the other night,

as a lover went down on me,

I came thinking it was you kissing me.

I saw it so clearly.

I can feel it now as I recall,

this warmth and spinning,

can’t stop thinking of you

movement.

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